My 5-a-day

If family is your staple food, then friends are definitely your five-a-day. You cannot survive solely on them but neither can you live without them. Try ignoring them from your daily life for a week or so and very soon you will realise just how bland things are. 

At my age, gone are the days of trying out new things. And neither does great taste equate to the best. When it comes to my five-a-day, I know what is best and what is useless for me on a bad day. Once in a while, I will stumble upon new stuff that does make me feel good but after a while, the side effects start showing and before long, what was initially deemed great become so sickening, the whole body just wants to be rid of it as quickly as possible. Thank God, those days do not come very often. I call that wisdom but you may call it skepticism.

When it comes to my fruits and vegetables, I will be the first to admit that I do omit them once in a while from my diet. But that doesn't necessarily mean that I forget how important they are or what kind of 'ailments' will ensue from ignoring them (Wink, wink someone!). You may be out of sight but you and your importance are never (repeat, NEVER) out of my mind.

So to all the apples, broccolis and carrots of my life (you know who you are, but if you are reading this, you are probably one), I am sorry I have to associate you with my diet. But judging from my ever increasing chin- and waistline, are you surprised? If I could, I would make you my staple food but that would mean having to blow up my stomach five times its size now and I will explode! Jokes aside, there are no simpler way of saying how important you are to me other than I will simply die without you. And to all the great tasting toxins masquerading as anti-oxidants (you know who you are too), thank God I have my tried and tested five-a-day to overcome you.

Fish in pajamas

It is true that a lot of people think of divers as some aliens who have nothing better to do or to spend their money on, who prefer to suck air out of a cylinder and to risk their life from shark attacks and drownings. Come to think of it, yes, we divers are indeed wierd. But, give diving a try and I can almost guarantee you will be hooked, if you can get over the seasickness and the sensation of breathing through your mouth.

Underwater on a healthy reef, I can guarantee you that you will indeed feel like an alien or everything around aliens to you. Gone are the images of silver dull fish that we see in the markets. Gone are the images of lifeless piece of meat covered in fried batter we see on our plates. The amount of life and colours will be the first to hit you. Upon examination of the life forms, you will start having dejavu when you feel as if you have seen some of the creatures on some cartoons or sci-fi films. To me, my ultimate thought is God is a genius! He is the real Picasso, the real Valentino.

Take for instance, this fish.

And I am talking just one species out of billions underwater. And I am just talking about the adult ones only. Who on earth would ever think of painting or dressing a fish in not one or two but three different kind of patterns. Genius! Aptly called the pajama cardinalfish, it's as if the fish has decided to adorn a pj on its hind half. 

Impressed? Bemused? Then I suggest you take up diving. This is not some fiction I come up with. It's nature on Earth. So spare us from being branded aliens. We are just humans who care enough to discover what lies beneath, the water that is!

Ps/ Pic taken on a recent trip at Raja Ampat which I can only describe as THE underwater safari! If you want an underwater aquarium, then I recommend Sipadan.

Redlob says .......

....... survival is not how long you can stay alive in the harshest of times but how much happiness you can squeeze out of it.

Room for rent .... sold!

When it comes to matters of the heart, how much room are we prepared to give up for someone else to occupy it? And for how long? And at what cost? To me, all these questions are insignificant due to one fundamental problem. There is never an agreement signed between you and the tenant to begin with. The landlady or landlord will always be at a disadvantage whatever happens.

If all is well, you probably get a tenant that does all the right things to only make your heart grow fonder. He or she pays his or her dues. Gifts and dinners reciprocated with care and love. Anniversaries remembered and ahem acts of love, right out of the roof! No surprise overnighters and the room always smells of you.

But more likely than not, you get a tenant that short-lives the stay, leaving piles of mess behind and create such a havoc in the neighborhood, the whole heart ends up empty and lifeless. Such an awful after-taste leaves you wondering 'Is it worth advertising again for a new tenant?' or maybe it is better off letting it out on a prepaid basis with seven years worth of deposit. You know what they say about tenants always itching to move out after seven years.

So next time, before you decide to take on a new tenant, remember everyone has a heart. Do we really need to share ours with another?

The Big Tissue Issue

Finally, a post that will make or break my blog. I am not one who complains about trivial things in life (just life as a whole) but this time I have to make an exception. It's something I came across first when studying in UK. It was a puzzle at first sight, but love prevails at the end.  Since returning home, I have completely forgotten about it until yesterday, when out of no where I came up with the words 'Tissue Issue', thought it would be a nice heading for a post, promised myself that I would write something befitting and here it is. KLEENEX TISSUES FOR MEN.

First sight. So apparently normal tissues are too girly. Or are they too delicate? Too small? Or is this a desperate attempt to introduce tissues to the other gender? The box looks bigger, is coloured black, has no scent and costs a little more than normal tissues. Who on earth would pay more for something that you only use for a few seconds and without giving a second thought, bin it? What on earth do men have more of that ordinary tissues cannot wipe? Tsk, tsk, shame on you Kleenex.

Second sight. Ok, ok, I give in. You do look kinda high quality, in your handsome and majestic box. And besides, it's buy one, get one free. Being a sucker for packaging and cheap bargains, I was sold.

Let's take a detour for now. Guys, hands up if you carry a box of tissues (or roll of toilet paper) by your bed. Girls, hands up if you have never noticed that in your boyfriends' rooms. Have you ever wondered why us boys invariably have a box of tissues conveniently located within arm's reach beside our beds? No, it's not because we drool or we sneeze when we sleep. And no we do not like to read Jane Austen to sleep. It's more like we read something else to sleep, or rather watch. So, gather what the tissues are for!

So like most other men, I put the two boxes of tissues on my bedside table. Now this is getting a bit personal, so if you are easily embarrassed by adult topics, I suggest you stop reading. Normally, I would use at least two of the ordinary tissues per 'pop' (ahem!), depending on when the last 'pop' was. But with this men tissue, I was pleasantly surprised to say, it mopped the whole thing up 'single-leafletly' (double ply, of course). I was enlightened. So, that is why Kleenex came up with men tissues. It's not because we have bigger noses or mouths to wipe. It's because we have an additional appendage to clean up. Derrr! It's not as if Kleenex can possibly call it, Kleenex tissues for spunk, can it? Although, if that was the case, it would be hands down, love at first sight!

And for the rest of my evenings in UK, it was happily ever after. Double the time for the bin to get filled, half the cost of my tissues needs. Hence, less nags from the missus. OK I made the last bit up, but I am quite sure, deep down she was eternally grateful for Kleenex tissues for men too.

Happily ever after

A dedication to those who have lived, loved, lost and continued to live.  We do not live in a world that always have to start with 'Once upon a time' and end with a 'happily ever after'. Come on, they are not called FAIRY tales just because they have fairies in them. They are not necessarily applicable to our modern days love stories. In fact, they are purely delusional. 

Why we were exposed to such lies right from our early days baffles me. If I were to have my ways, I would show my children 'animal planet' from day one. It is a dog eats dog world, survival of the fittest.

Your happily ever after does not have to rely on another person. You are the sole determinant of how happy you want to be and for how long you want it to be. True, it does not come easy, at times you have to work really hard to achieve it. And at times, people will try to stop you. But the point is, it is your life. You control it. Know your friends from your foes, your family from the fuckwits. And remember, no one will ever ever love yourself more than your own self.

So, congratulations to those who have found their other halves (but deep down you still know who love yourself more!) and to those more fortunate ones, continue keeping the loves to your own selves. Some things are better left unshared.

Love is everything

Finally, a korean film that did it for me. The film industry in Korea has churned out numerous films that have invaded Asia and now seem to have hit the right spot for the western world too. What come straight to our minds are probably countless horror films usually with the posters or dvd covers showing solemn, paler than pale faces of the leading actress with their necks twisted in an awkward way and/or with blood streaking down their eyes. However, the film that really inspired me so much as to write it as a blog is a comedy called 'Sex is zero'.

I was first introduced to this film a few years back when my koreans-loving friend asked for my help to search the dvd out. She had no time as she was practically glued to her laptop watching the latest epsiodes of various korean dramas simultaneously on different windows. Now, talk about multi-tasking! Strange she does not have cross eyes yet. Few years down the line, she is still as crazy about the koreans and has even dragged her beloved to do the same. If that is not love, I don't know what is.

Back to the film, obviously my search was futile being just released in Korea at that time and was top in the box office for few weeks. I have totally forgotten about it until I saw the sequel in the shops early this year. And lo and behold, the prequel was lying faithfully by it's side. Upon examining their covers, I could not help but think that they are just the Asian versions of 'American pie'. I was put off by the idea and nonchalantly put them back where they belong thinking, 'Ahhh, maybe next time when I really have nothing to watch.'

That was not the last of it. Like an unwavering cold, this film was more persistent than I thought. It popped up in my brother's room today. Now, my brother is not one who would readily experiment with cross-culture films. Then I remember the title. And who says sex does not sell?

No doubt, the title says it all. A comedy about sex. But like what the title also says, sex is not everything in this film. It has it's equal amount of drama, tear-jerking moments and of course funny scenes. It really had me reaching for the tissues (ahem, not just to wipe my eyes!). 

The thing about korean comedies I have watched is that they are pretty draggy in the middle. The funny bits just evaporated into numbing and unrelated scenes. I was expecting the same thing with 'Sex is zero' but was pleasantly surprised to discover that I was kept entertained right to the end and in fact, was yearning for more.

All in all, a most deserving ten out of ten for a comedy from Asia. Not good enough for me to want to watch the sequel but maybe that's because I do not want to be disappointed or maybe I still have that bad after-taste from korean comedies in the past.